Posts Tagged ‘ Gypsy ’

One Horse Town? We Don’t Even Have a Stable

Another weekend too short. Another reluctant goodbye. For 13 months, he’s been miles and miles away from me, our lives too busy and conflicting to successfully blend. April can’t come fast enough. As hard as it is to watch his jeep speed him away from me, I know that the distance is about to close. I finish school in March — In April, Eden and I are pulling up stakes and moving to MC. A new city, a new job, a new place with my two loves. While I’m a little scared to move away from my family and 90% of my friends — I know this move will be for the best.

MC is a pretty big place, with thousands of people, one of the best school districts in the state, and so many opportunities for me and the Girl. But MC is also a fairly small place — large by my standards (my hometown has 900 people in it), but tiny by national standards. It’s safe and friendly like a small country town with the advantages of a city.

I’m excited. This will really mean a new chapter in my life. I’m ready to make the transition from awkward not-quite-teen-not-quite-adult to adult getting a place with her partner, raising her children and working in the field she’s been training in for years. No more research papers, late-night cram sessions and juggling single motherhood with midterms and a long-distance love affair.

I hope “The Real World” is all I’m hyping it up to be.

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Wander

Every so often something happens. The wind changes, the earth shifts, and I get restless. The kind of restlessness that has formed my reputation as being a gypsy. I have a need to pick up and move…change everything. Change towns, change jobs, change majors, change something, anything. Nothing can stay the same for too long or I’ll stagnate.

It’s hard for me to explain, and harder for me to predict. I never know when it’s about to happen, but when it does, it’s overwhelming. Like my head can’t sit still, and there’s this feeling in my chest like I can’t breathe all the way in or out. I start feeling constrained, start questioning everything. I feel that I need to pack me and Eden up and move far away. Change it all. The only thing stopping me is money. I don’t have the finances to transplant us, and while pre-baby me wouldn’t have gave a crap, current me wants to make sure my girl has all the stuff she need while she and her mommy play vagabond.

Sometimes the wind changes, the earth shifts.

Right now, the earth’s shifted and I need a change. Hopefully a box of hair color will fix it, or we’ll be renting a u haul.